I have been working in mediation again. This time it is with folks who are getting a divorce, and it is my job to help them create a "Parenting Plan" in order for them to somehow share time with their children. I find when I get into these cases there are layers and layers of issues.....for some the divorce is fresh and there is tension and grief related to the lost marriage. For others, there is resentment about how time was spent with the kids pre-divorce. Then there are issues of money, communication, insurance, pets, chores, discipline issues, new significant-others, hard-to-wrangle teenagers who would just rather be immancipated, time with Grandparents, holidays, relocation, funds, and so much more.
I thought I would enjoy doing this again, and it became evident to me this week. I have been working with a particularly challenging case, which I doubted could ever be solved through mediation. I tried everything. I concentrated on staying solution-focused and positive. I consulted with others. I thought about it at night. Still, it did not seem like they would ever be able to find a common solution.
To my surprise.....
today they signed a very thorough and detailed agreement on how they will both continue to be loving and present parents in their childrens' lives. I was so moved.
My colleague congratulated me for "steering this difficult ship into port." It felt just like that. Relief. Calm after the storm. Satisfaction.
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2 comments:
way. to. go.
bring some of that steering to our house.
oh, you're doing important work!
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